Human – HOW TO BE;

After meaningful conversations with friends, I always come always feeling inspired; reflective and motivated. The same can be said for this blog. I get to listen back to the interviews, relive the memories, pick apart what people have said and ask the whole world to celebrate them with me. Once each post has gone live, I am thrilled that more people get to read about these incredible people and get a glimpse into what makes them human.

I invite you all into an open letter to each of my guests after their final blog has been posted. I want to outline what their slices of honesty mean to me and how they better help me to understand people. If nothing else, see this as a bookmark in their story.

Dear Hannah,

Your interview was, hands down, one of my favourites. Not just because you are an incredible human with a staggering amount of wisdom but also because I got to relive all of the laughs, the silences, the inside jokes, the pensive pauses, the sideways glances and every other nuance that makes you an inspirational human. I hope that transcribed well to the blog and people got to know you on a certain level but, truth be told, this section is for me and I was full of joy writing out what you had said. Thank you for letting me in.

It’s hard to pinpoint the exact moment I felt such a connection with you but I often think back to working in Moles together, on cheese nights, and getting our absolute lives. I was a shy, recently outed, wildly unconfident little man but there you were: this absolute goddess who pranced around behind the bar, singing her heart out to Spice Girls. You took me under your wing and inspired me from day dot. You were unapologetically yourself and that gave me the drive to find myself too. Without even realising it, you inspire so many people just by being you.

I know you say you have lost a lot of confidence and self-esteem over the years but, even talking about who you were and how you were, we both know you can find that person again. She is in there – hidden underneath layers of rejection, COVID stresses, London lifestyle and adulthood responsibilities – and she is coming right back out. You have found the motivation to search for who you are and that takes a lot of courage, time, patience and desire. You have bucket loads. It’s brave to be so open about uncertainty and, again, that has only inspired me more to delve harder into my therapy; ask more challenging questions in my interviews; and reach out to friends for answers and support. Most of all, support.

The hardships you have faced up until now have certainly shaped you as a person but you still boast this warm, funny, positive, friendly personality. I am always in awe of you. The way you hold yourself – your physicality and sentimentality – is beautiful, even down to your laugh which fills me with joy whether it’s a hearty guffaw or a tiny giggle. You could have built up this hard exterior and refused to let anyone in but the fact that you walk with your head held high, proud of your journey, will always fill others with awe. It really hit home when you were describing your jigsaw like mind and how you piece together everything: I think so many other humans do that too and being so open about such a personal thing will undoubtedly help hundreds.

This sense of community you feel is obvious. You are helping others without even realising it and I have no doubt you will continue to do this so long as you find and follow what sparks joy and makes you happy. But you are already well on your way to that discovery and I am overjoyed that you are finding little victories on your way to the bigger picture.

You, of all people, know it means to be; Hannah.

All my love, always,

Mitch
xo

Dear Hayley,

I wanted to preface all of this by saying I know just how hard you find it to talk about how you feel. It means the world that you let me open up these conversations with you and, even though they were challenging, share them with the world. The things you have to say are helpful and insightful to so many and pushing yourself past the point of comfort is how, I believe, we understand our humanity better.

That’s one of the reasons I wrote “brave” as one of your traits. It’s probably a word you wouldn’t ascribe to yourself but I truly see you as one of my bravest friends. The things you have done – from joining the army to moving to the NHS, from soldering (literally) through a rocky upbringing to learning how to cope with the loss of loved ones – are mighty and you have tackled each one with confidence and bravery. The world really could do with a lot more of your pizzazz and shine when it comes to adversity. I am truly inspired by your bravery and I only hope to emulate it in several areas of my life.

Having been close for so long, and dealing with so many hardships together (you were my first kiss after all…), I feel we are cemented. I might not see you for months at a time but, when we reconnect, it is exactly that – an honest re-connection. You make so much time for the ones you love and that is beautiful to see. Maybe you hit the nail on the head when you said that the lack of motherly love you received as a child has meant you are more of a mother figure to us all now. A boozy, loud, blunt mother but one we love all the same. You look after everyone in your life without even realising it and that is something you cannot teach. I am learning to be more considerate outside of my professional responsibility and you are a great role model for that.

You and I are both very hard on ourselves but I hope that after reading your interview back, you realise just how special and important you are. Sometimes it takes something like this to really understand how other people see you and what they admire. Nobody is frightened of emotions or vulnerability and knowing that we love each other in the same way has allowed me to reflect on how I open up to other people. You are always so honest but somehow manage to take feelings into consideration before you react. That takes a lot of practice but, through this friendship, you show me exactly how to do that.

It was a genuine pleasure to talk to you about these things and I don’t want you going away thinking you are boring or selfish. You are sure of yourself – you know what you like – and you are unapologetic about that. And nobody really knows the meaning of their life: it’s just great to see you working toward figuring out who you really are. I couldn’t admire you any more than I already do.

You, of all people, know what it means to be; Hayley.

All my love, always,

Mitch
xo

Tag: Human

MORE LIKE HANNAH;

MORE LIKE HAYLEY;